PLASTIC FANTASTIC
In contrast to last weeks “pig ugly” post, Thursdays Queen St events struck me with a strange reminder of the impact of greenwashing. The “boobs on bikes” parade caused a bit of an uproar. At last count David Farrars blog post on the subject had 176 comments (of which I’ve only read three).

From my “mainstream” perspective, boobs are indeed a fine thing. Although they come in all shapes and sizes, some are augmented in order to raise the appeal of the person behind them. And that my friends, is where the sustainability similarities arise. A boob-job is most likely boobwashing, and like greenwashing, you’ve gotta be sceptical about what sits behind the brand.

“Oooh look at me, look at these fantastic initiatives I have implemented in order to save the world!” But is overt, front of house appeal merely an effort to divert attention from the repellent activity elsewhere? Or is it the first step toward becoming a better organisation/person. (I’m tempted to elaborate on reference to Tyler Durden – the ultimate “anti consumerist” – who uses cosmetic surgery waste to make soap in Fight Club, but I won’t…).

There are of course those greenwashers who are blessed with a public front that is naturally appealing. Like a kebab shop – purveyors of healthy square meals but served wrapped in throwaway tinfoil and often only palatable after five pints of lager. And Jessica Simpson who was covered by The Onion last week rampantly promoting her (natural I think) breasts as being her only entertainment credentials.

“…breasts are the leading cause of film careers among women ages 18 to 35.”

Digging down a strata, we see a fundamental difference between Boobs on Bikes and Simpson. As one or two promoters of the bike event said “it’s not about porn” (although it clearly was) “it’s about celebrating breasts”. So while Simpson was merely promoting herself, the bikers were giving a collective high-five for breasts generally. And for that alone I applaud the bikers.

According to my boobwash argument, my applause is only valid if breast awareness has positive social outcomes. If the strong male audience was anything to go by the outcomes were quite narrow. Although I was pleased to see that other Queen St events were able to capitalise on the parades' popularity.

It is plain rediculous that a porn show could be promoted to a lunchtime crowd in Queen Street, but it's plain brilliant of the promoters to work the "it's about celebrating breasts" angle. If for nothing else, I'm ecstatic that the parade proved the death of Spike Milligan (pictured) was a hoax.